| I Wanna Go Back! |
By Pastor Joseph Brennan
Exodus 14: 10-12 "As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up, and
there were the Egyptians marching after them. They were terrified and cried
out to the Lord. They said to Moses, 'Was it because there were no graves
in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us
by bringing us up out of Egypt? Didn't we say to you in Egypt, 'leave us
alone; let us serve the Egyptians'? It would have been better for us to
serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert."
Several years ago, when I was a laymember of an LCMS congregation, my Pastor
and I became very close. He was my best friend, my confessor, my
counselor. He was in the very biblical sense, my dear pastor. I was, at
that time the owner of a small and sometimes struggling business, and I
would often seek out his advice on a number of issues concerning both
business and religion. He was always available for me. There were also
times when he honored me by asking me opinions about certain things and I
would try to be of assistance to him.
There were a number of occasions when we both experienced frustrations from
our vocations; his as Pastor and mine as a businessman and we would
commiserate with one another; a sort of misery loves company type of thing.
I remember once that we jokingly referred to these times as "whining
sessions." Later we came across the above verses in the scripture and
noticed how Israel, whenever they were between the rock and the hard place,
almost invariably began to whine. This became our private joke between us.
Whenever one of us would began to express our frustrations over our jobs the
other would listen for a short while and then would say something like, "why
don't you quit whining and get back to work." And we would both laugh and
get back to work. It was a tension reliever and it also helped us to see
that sometimes we just needed to "blow off a little steam," and then having
done so, to stop whining and get back to work.
Now I have become a Pastor, and I still consider my "home" Pastor to be my
Pastor. We still have the closest of relationships which is really only
available to Christians, the relationship of two people who are in Christ
Jesus. And we still occasionally have our "whining sessions."
That's what I would like to have now in this article, a whining session with
the whole church. Having been a Pastor for a period of time I really find
that I sometimes am a bit confused and baffled by what I see happening in
our church and other churches. I find myself like Israel, whining and
complaining, and saying " I wanna go back!" But its not back to Egypt that
I want to go, rather its back to what is always fondly referred to as "The
Good Old Days."
All of us have a perception of these good old days. Generally older people
remember when young people were respectful in the good old days. And
remember when you could buy a gallon of gasoline for 23 cents back in the
good old days. There is, I think in us, a kind of a mental longing for
the good old days. I remember back when I was in the U.S. Navy during the
Vietnam war. I remember thinking then that this was the most awful
experience in my life. Thirty some years later I sit wondering where
anybody today could get a job that offered thirty days paid vacation in
their very first year, three meals provided at no cost everyday, full
medical, dental and vision care. See what I mean---the good old days.
Well, I as a Pastor, don't really know from first hand experience about the
good old days of Lutheranism, nor do I even know that they ever existed. I
just know that I want to go back---back to the good old days. I know that
we can get back to them because the precepts of the good old days are
Biblical precepts. So even though we in Lutheranism may have never had any
good old days, we can still go back to them, because they are based on the
Bible and our own Lutheran Confessions.
Back To The Good Old Days
I wanna go back to a time when Lutherans wanted to go to church, not because
they had to; but because going to church, receiving the sacraments, having
sins forgiven, having faith strengthened and preserved by God Himself, was
more important than going to a Mall, or to the kids baseball game; When it
was more important than having a day to sleep in or to watch a football
game. When it just didn't feel right the whole rest of the week if church
was missed on Sunday. And speaking of Church, I wanna go back to a time
when no one would ever think of talking about the weather or any other vain
triviality prior to worship. A time when people reverently entered into the
sanctuary, in quiet expectation of receiving all of the blessings of God
through His word and sacraments. A time when they would say with their
hearts and minds, “Lord I love the habitation of thy house, and the place
where Thy glory dwells.” When they prepared their hearts and minds to hear
God speak to them through their Pastor who made a promise to "feed Jesus'
sheep." I wanna go back to a time when Lutherans Churches were built with
kneelers attached to the pews. When people knelt down to confess their sins
and to pray. I wanna go back to when sermons had a proper distinction
between God's law and God's Gospel, when people would weep in sorrow and
terror as they heard of their utter unworthiness to be saved, and then were
lifted up to the highest heaven to hear of the love of God for them through
His son Jesus Christ. A time when sermons were sermons, not motivational
speeches about the power of positive thinking, or how Christians were
expected to live their lives. A time when the Divine Service was where your
sins were forgiven rather than a place where you learned of your own twelve
step recovery program.
I particularly wanna go back to when the Holy Spirit built the church, when
the Lord and giver of Life added to the church those who were being saved.
When we really believed that the Holy Spirit was responsible for the growth
of the church through the Gospel and the Ssacraments. When Lutherans knew
that the Book of Concord was the confessional writings of the church and
they actually owned a copy and read them! When they knew that Augsburg was
an important city in Reformation history, and not a beer; a time when they
understood that a Pastor, as the ambassador of Jesus Christ, stood and spoke
in the place of Jesus Christ, the very words of Jesus Christ which are able
to make us wise unto salvation.
I wanna go back to a time when sin was understood, not as a dysfunction we
have that can be corrected and overcome with the right effort, but as a
terrible thing we do over and against which we are helpless because we are
by nature sinful and unclean. When people confronted with temptation said,
like Joseph in the Old Testament, "How can I commit this terrible sin
against God?" I wanna go back to a time when people came to their pastor in
anguish of spirit and confessed their sin in private, hungering and
thirsting to hear that their sins are forgiven and finding rest from a
distressed conscience; a time when Lutherans announced, their intention to
partake of Holy Communion, asking their pastor to assist them, maybe even
teach them to examine themselves according to the Ten Commandments and their
station in life. And speaking of communion, I'd like to go back to a time
when people believed that Jesus Christ, who instituted this Sacrament for
the special comforting and strengthening of those who hunger and thirst
after righteousness, would never allow someone to get sick or infected by a
germ or virus when partaking of the Chalice. You know, a time when
Lutherans had great faith rather than weak faith concerning the benefits of
the Lord's Holy Supper.
I wanna go back to a time when the family was seen as a spiritual unit and
not an economic unit bombarded with programs and commercials targeted at
every age group in the family. I wanna go back to a time when children
were instructed in the Catechism, not so they could pass a test and get
confirmed, but rather so they new that this instruction was for their entire
life. A time when the father was the spiritual head, who taught the family
how to pray. A time when a role model was a father and not a sports hero.
A man who taught that the Christian life consists in “fixing our eyes upon
Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith,” and not on how well we live. I
wanna go back to a time when families ate dinner together, instead of
running off to soccer games. A time when divorce was unthinkable because
people believed that problems have solutions and the solution is generally
found in the forgiveness of sins. A time when people understood that
Children need a mother and a father. A time when forgiveness reigned
supreme within the family, and moms and dads sacrificed for the sake of
their children.
Do you get the idea? You see I'm really tired of telling Christians that
they should go to church. I'm tired of sending letters that begin by
saying; "its been four weeks since we've seen you in church", "is there a
problem?" And then having them get mad at me because it took four weeks for
me to check up on them! I’m tired of trying to convince them that it is in
Church where Jesus is to be found in this world, not on a mountain or in a
camping ground or at the golf course. He’s just not there.
I'm tired of talking about sociology and psychology in circuit meetings,
district conventions, and synodical conventions. I’m tired of hearing how
we need to do this or do that in order to make the church grow. I’m tired
of the underlying assumption that the Church isn’t doing enough when Christ
is being proclaimed and the sacraments are being administered. I wanna talk
about theology. I'm tired of programs, and pragmatism, and self help groups
and small cell groups in the church. I’m tired of all the various ministries
that have been invented. I don't believe for a minute that primary
spiritual care comes through small groups but rather primary spiritual care
comes through the means of GRACE, Baptism, the Word, Holy Absolution and the
Lord’s Supper, as the body of Christ gathers to receive this grace, and this
mercy from the Lord Jesus Christ through His called and Ordained servants.
I do not believe that the goal of the Gospel is a morally improved life but
rather I am convinced that the goal of the Gospel is our salvation,
forgiveness, and abundant life in Jesus Christ, and knowing one has peace
with God. I believe that preaching ought to be about Jesus Christ and what
He has done and does for us and not us and how we are to live for Him and
what we are to do.
I don't think that it is a good idea to call Lutheran Churches, Community
Churches, because we don't have to apologize for being Lutheran! We don’t
have to apologize for teaching the same things that Jesus and the Apostles
and the prophets before them taught. We should never feel guilty for being
the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church. After all we didn’t make
ourselves that – The Holy Spirit made us that.
I think that Lutherans should stop saying, "this is my church, I was born
here, married here and I will be buried here,” because it is not your
church, it belongs to Jesus Christ! He calls it into existence through the
Gospel and He preserves it through the Gospel – His Gospel and His Church!
I happen to think that Pastors should probably stick to preaching, teaching,
administering the sacraments, visiting the sick and dying, loving Christ’s
people, and one day bringing them to Jesus Christ and saying to Him, "Here
are the ones you gave me to watch over, I have done as you asked me to do."
I think Pastors should be “caretakers of souls,” and not business managers.
I think the church should be thought of theologically, not sociologically.
We should understand the Church by what it is, not by what it does. And
what it is, is that place where the Gospel is preached in truth and purity
and where the Sacraments are administered according to the institution of
Jesus Christ. And where this happens the Holy Spirit will work faith when
and where He wills it.
You see I didn’t become a Pastor to become an administrator, chief executive
officer, janitor, secretary, counselor, psychiatrist, etc, etc. I’m not the
cheerleader of a congregation leading the people in their cheers of praise.
I don't want to have to dream up a new contemporary, vibrant worship service
every week or month. I happen to think that our historic liturgy, which is
chock full of quotes from the bible, could create faith in the hearts of any
pagan who happens to come into our church.
I want to be a Pastor of a church that only has room for sinners as members.
I do not want to be thought of as someone who counsels people, but rather as
someone who forgives people their sins, because I’m not here to solve people
’s problems. I’m here to forgive their sins. I do not want a church that
sees itself as a holiness club, with wonderful people who always do and say
all the right things but rather a people who hunger and thirst after
righteousness.
You see I love sinners and I love the liturgy of the church. I love it
because it reflects our understanding of the God whom we worship, who is
called among other names, THE ANCIENT OF DAYS, the One who is Thrice Holy.
I love asking God to "Open Thou My Lips" because if He doesn't open my lips
and give me what to say to Him, I might say something stupid or
insignificant or even wrong and disrespectful for that matter, because after
all, I am simply a poor, miserable sinner who is entering into the presence
of the living, Holy God, with nothing to give Him but what He has already
given me. I'm sick of hearing about how we have to learn new paradigms for
ministry; I think that we ought to rediscover and learn the old ones first.
I really don't believe that the world has changed all that much from what it
has always been. I think that it is just as hostile to Christianity now as
it has always been. In other words, I think its still full of sinners.
You see I want all of these things for us Lutherans and for our Churches
(and will whine to get them) for the same reasons that I became a Lutheran
thirty some years ago, and a Pastor thirteen years ago. I find the
forgiveness of all my sins to be the most amazing truth in this whole world.
When I stop and think that the Bible, God's Word, Holy Absolution,
Baptism, and Holy Communion, are God's gifts to us, and through these gifts
He has made us His lovely, radiant bride, whom He has cleansed, with these
gifts in order to present us to Himself, without spot or blemish, I stand in
awe, no, rather I fall on my knees in worship and adoration to a God who
calls me out of the depths of my depravity and sin by the Gospel, enlightens
me with His gifts, sanctifies, and keeps me in the one true faith, even as
He does so for His whole Christian Church on Earth, and will one day give
unto me and all believers Eternal life.
I can't think of anything that gives me greater joy than to be able to step
up in a Pulpit and proclaim these tremendous truths of God. My heart soars
to the very heights of heaven when in the privacy of my office I get to be a
Pastor when a broken down miserable sinner, weeping tears of repentance,
hears through me that God has forgiven them all their sins, and they are
cleansed from all unrighteousness. I am proud to be a partner of Jesus
Christ in the Gospel. I think was born to be a Pastor.
I love it when the kids whom I teach in confirmation classes finally “get
it” and rejoice in their salvation. When they know that they are unworthy
to be saved but through the grace of God in Christ are saved anyway.
So you see I wanna go back. I wanna go back in the worst way. And at Risen
Christ Lutheran Church we are on the way back.
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